1) The length of my moustache - it seems to have ceased growing altogether.
2) The bushiness of my moustache - see above.
3) Ladies eagerly taking up my previous challenge - this has stagnated at zero, which is the worst stagnation of all.
4) Donations! That's right! It's been days since anyone has donated anything!
Come on, people, last year I managed to raise over £100 but this year I've barely cleared £40 and we're nearly 2/3 of the way through! We need to step it up a notch!
I've got a fantastic offer for you guys. Once I clear £50, I'll post a hilarious and entertaining interview with Tim Hampson, the only member of La Maison Moustache so far not to get some bloggy attention!
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